Tasting notes à la Jørgen Leth

Jeg elsker at læse tasting notes. Især om vine, som jeg har en særlig interesse for, men hvis noten er velskrevet, er den en fryd at læse, uanset om jeg har intention om nogensinde at sætte sine læber til den pågældende vin. Men hvad skal den ideelle tasting note indeholde? Her kommer mit bud:

Stamdata: Producent, land, appellation, mark, årgang, druer, evt. fremstillingsteknik, pris & forhandleroplysninger.
Beskrivelse: Udseende (farve og intensitet), næse (aroma & bouquet), smagsprofil, struktur (syre, tanniner, sikker, mouth feel), eftersmag.
Evaluering: Er det en god vin? (evt. point score), pris vs. kvalitet, evt. sammenligning med tilsvarende vine.
Extras: Uddybende informationer om producenten, årgangen, regionen, forslag til gode mad match.

Men selvom alle informationer er på plads, er mange tasting notes stadig - pardon my English - røvsyge. Det er lidt ligesom filmanmeldelser. Det er sjovest, hvis anmelderen viser sin personlighed, har lidt kant, vover at være lidt provokerende. Eller som en god Tour de France-kommentator: Man skal kunne mærke hans entusiasme, begejstring eller skuffelse og helst sidde tilbage med en følelse af, at man var der selv. Jeg er helt klart til Jørgen Leth'ske tasting notes, som er poetiske, kreative, billedrige, subjektive, medrivende, humoristiske, inspirerende og vidende. Det er en svær kunst - men her et par eksempler. De er måske ikke ligefrem ideelle, men yderst underholdende og efterlader læseren med et stærk indtryk af anmelderens vinoplevelse:

Serge Birbrair om 1989 Gruaud Larose:
'Opened together with suspect DOA 1985 Mouton got this one ahead from the get go, but this si where being ahead just stopped. Overpowered by it’s more regal brother and left far behind. This is a very good wine and in the right place, but it just can’t keep up, just like F15 which is a good jet can’t keep up with Columbia shuttle. I still enjoy leftovers from the bottle which spent a night on the counter, and I advice strongly not to put this beauty in head to head competition with First Growth, as it destined to lose.'          

Eller hvad med denne her fra Cellar Tracker:
'This wine makes me angry. angry because i can no longer afford it, angry because it plays with your emotions. this is the pinnacle of wine drinking – and that is coming from a guy who sh-ts on so many burgs. this is outrageous, complex, stimulating, ever evolving, captivating – and overall just a damn complete wine. my wife and i agreed that this was plain and simple something special, impossible to articulate.'

Eller denne her fra Old Parn, som excellerer i bandeord som en anden Gordon Ramsay:
My first question: what the hell are you doing there, like some big slug, in front of your computer? God knows. Because you should already be halfway to your nearest Marks & Spencer to seize a bottle (or twelve) of this Fiano. It’s bloody good, you see. And, until early September, it seems to be reduced to an almost insultingly cheap £5.99. It’s a lemony ol’ bugger — with a pleasantly zesty, unapologetic waft to it. A proper noseful. And once it’s made its way to your gob? Again, unapologetic: it’s not timid, thin or reticent. It doesn’t linger around on the fringes; it dives on in. A good, solid mouthful, with a zip and a skip to it. It’s rounded, balanced. You can drink it without food and your mouth won’t shrivel up like an old woman in a bath.

Listen, what I’m saying is that this is really nice — and, right now, a staggeringly good bargain. In no way do I expect to run up against a wine like this for less than £6. It’s the kind of white wine I’m very happy to shove in my face, repeatedly, perhaps even to excess. And at this price, you should shove it into yours, too.

Og hvis du kommer til kort, kan du jo altid prøve denne tasting note generator, som hjælper uinspirerede vinanmeldere lidt på vej...

Skål og til tasterne, venner!